Funny statuses, very funny statuses. New Year is a time of fairy tales and magic

Are you the life of the party, a cheerful person, do you like to use VKontakte, ICQ or classmates? You can also amuse your friends on social networks by posting witty, cool status, which will make the most gloomy and serious visitor to your page smile. A modern person cannot live without a sense of humor: there is so much stress, problems and difficulties around. Make people forget about them at least for a while: let them smile when they visit your page. Here you will find the latest, constantly updated collection of funny, amusing, witty, cool phrases.

What will you find with us?

Having entered this section, get ready to laugh heartily and sincerely at the jokes that are collected here. The most funny statuses will delight you with their wit and novelty. We have a wide selection of the most unique phrases:

• funny declarations of love for those who can appreciate subtle, romantic humor;
• the most new cool statuses for pages on any social networks (updated daily);
• witty statements with which you can express your own attitude towards life or even a specific person;
• funny jokes on the phone.

If you haven't found it yet sayings for status are cool and funny, you very successfully wandered into this particular section on our website: you yourself will laugh heartily and amuse your friends with a funny statement displayed in your status.

What is possible on our website?

Users of our site enjoy the most unlimited freedom and have extensive opportunities:

So being a regular user of our site is a pleasure, the opportunity to constantly update the coolest statuses on your personal pages on social networks. Smart, good jokes will always cheer up those who surround you and understand you: give them a smile - share with them cool status from our website.

Nothing is eternal. Everything bad and everything good ends sooner or later. This is a rule, a law of life. To understand its meaning would be to understand the meaning of life.
Bad things leave experiences, and good things give memories. Experience and memories are our life, probably the most priceless thing in it.

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The winner in life is the one who knows how to survive in the world of gossip.

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Live! As long as you live! Tired? Take it and catch your breath! Fell? Hold your friend's hand! And if there is no friend... Pray! Will they ask? Give it away, don't think about it. Not appreciated? Do not be angry. Did you close the door? Don't come back.. They want to teach you? Learn! Are they in a hurry to betray? Don't give in! And they betrayed you? Forgiveness, revenge! Have you opened your soul? Open up.. But don’t give everything up! Someday you will have to return to all these words. Live! As long as you live! And God sees everything here and there.

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Never complain about fate! You will upset your friends, you will please your enemies, you will not help yourself.

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If you have a problem, try to solve it. If you can't solve it, then don't make a problem out of it)

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The most terrible enemy is doubt. Because of it, we lose what we could have gotten, but didn’t even try.

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No one can go back in time and change their start, but everyone can start now and change their finish!!!

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Thanks to everyone who refused to help me! It was thanks to you that I managed to do it alone!

Too many people break down without even realizing how close to success they were at the moment they lost heart.

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Fate is a very convenient word for those who never want to make decisions!

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If yesterday was lost due to some mistake, then do not lose today by remembering this.

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Many people walk around with a corpse inside them. Without even noticing that their spiritual world had committed suicide.

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Never listen to anyone. Have your own opinion, your own head, your own thoughts and ideas, plans for life. Don't chase after anyone - just take a step towards the meeting, but not in pursuit. Nobody needs you. That's life. No one will build your happiness for you!!!

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Never complain about fate! She may not be very pleased with you either))

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To become a great man, you need to be able to skillfully use everything that fate offers.

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A lucky person is one who is able to build a strong foundation from the stones that others throw at him!

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When life gives you hundreds of reasons to cry, show it that you have thousands of reasons to smile.

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Cigarettes without filter. Glasses without glasses. Doors without handles. People without brains. It's just so fashionable.

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I love the early morning, about five o'clock. You're walking and there's not a soul on the street. The world seems clean.

On the eve of the long-awaited and magical New Year holiday, people are preparing to congratulate each other with original and very sweet congratulations. But in the modern world, it is not enough to just say: “Congratulations,” you also need to show the whole world through social networks your mood on the eve of New Year’s Eve. True, it’s not always possible to find the right words, so when coming up with meaningful statuses about the New Year 2016, pay attention to the following options.

Dear women! Under no circumstances should you ask Grandfather Frost for a fairy-tale life for the New Year. He still won’t be able to make you a princess, but he will definitely send Ivanushka the Fool as a gift.

My dear and beloved mother-in-law! Congratulations on your 2016.

– Tell me: do you believe in the existence of Santa Claus?
– Which Santa Claus? It doesn't even exist! Grandfather Frost himself told me about this in confidence.

When you send out New Year's greetings to everyone you know, don't forget to call your mom back.

They say that on New Year's Eve all wishes can come true, even those who did not want to do this throughout the year. So start dreaming now.

When falling face first into a salad on New Year's Eve, you should remember that it is a little springy.

The smartest philologists know that Santa Claus can actually be called the Low-Temperature Pensioner.

New Year's Eve is that wonderful time when the festive dinner smoothly flows into breakfast.

Grandfather Frost, I beg you! Let someone wish for me for the New Year!

Winter is created in white colors for a reason. The universe itself gives you the opportunity to try to start your life over again with the arrival of the New Year.

Today I saw a man in our yard taking the Christmas tree to the trash... Weakling! But there are only 2 months left...

The first disappointment in the coming New Year: “I can’t do it anymore... Food just won’t fit...”

Do you know what a real crisis is? One more week after the New Year to finish eating December salads!

We have good traditions: if a person did not have time to complete some very important task by the New Year, he is given 2 weeks for a second chance.

Remember that tomorrow is page 1 of 365 in your new book called 2016. Try to write it better than you finished the last one.

Santa Claus! Give me a magic wand for New Year, and I will fulfill the rest of my wishes myself.

If Grandfather Frost crossed your path with a bag of gifts, you know that somewhere nearby they are celebrating the New Year with great joy.

The New Year smells of tangerines, pine needles and Soviet champagne.

With age, a man’s priorities change, and if at the age of 5 he was waiting for the arrival of Father Frost, then at 15 he would not mind meeting the Snow Maiden on New Year’s Eve.

At first, everyone believes in the phrase: “How you celebrate the New Year is how you will spend it,” and then for a long time they cannot understand how to wean themselves from eating at night.

With the help of such short sayings in honor of the arrival of the New Year 2016, you can a little appease the symbol of the coming 12 months. Upcoming holidays!

The word "status" comes from the Latin language and literally means "state" when applied to an object or subject.

The word receives a narrower meaning thanks to the accompanying words: legal - the position of a citizen in the state, enshrined and guaranteed legally, social - the position of an individual in society, immune - a characteristic of the state of functioning of the human immune system, in a social network - the state of a person positioned in the virtual world to other Internet users . Let’s dwell on Internet statuses, as the most creative and modern phenomenon, in a little more detail, and in order to fill our narrative with depth, we will choose as an example: statuses about life with meaning, new in 2016 – 2017.

The essence of status in a social network

A status on a social network is a short statement in writing, which, in some cases, can be supplemented with graphic elements, expressing the emotional or other state of the user who posted it. The basic principles of Internet status are the following: the recommended volume is up to 160 characters with spaces, the intended purpose is to position one’s status to a wide or limited circle of Internet users, the semantic load is the quintessence of the individual’s state in relation to himself, the people around him, the world, and so on.

Philosophical statuses about life 2016-2017

The finitude of having is not the finitude of being.

How often in a hurry we do not have time and how many things are resolved by simply waiting.

Life is a game process where we roll the dice ourselves or transfer the rights to ourselves to third parties.

We have the power to control our destiny, but the destiny of Nature can control us.

By focusing our attention on small and insignificant things, how often we miss opportunities for great achievements.

Everything is possible in life, but not all goals are adequate to the means spent to achieve them.

Pleasure from the process is the main rule of a harmonious life.

The eternal search for the meaning of life leaves no time for life itself.

Life-affirming statuses

>My life is my rules.

I am the master of my life.

The main thing is to correctly distribute roles and give instructions.

My goals, your means are the key to achieving success in life.

I have one rule - to live.

Happiness and suffering are two sides of the same moment. Anyone has the strength to turn the moment the right way.

The meaning of life is in the search for meaning.

Live today, remember yesterday, plan for tomorrow.

Statuses about life in poetic form

I made a lot of mistakes - life experience became my reward.

I don’t try to find out the meaning of life - I want to love, worry, suffer.

Whatever you wish for me, may it be returned to you threefold.

There is nothing better in life than simply living to spite your enemies.

How often do we play with fate, forgetting about our loved ones.

The more you want to have, the more often you cry and suffer.

He who recognizes the essence of his life is in no hurry and does not suffer.

I give you the key to happiness: I am simply loved and I love.

Everything will happen in life if you are not lazy.

Humorous statuses about life 2016-2017

There is no way out except from the coffin.

I found the meaning of life: to sleep, eat and reproduce.

Never do what others can do for you.

He who knows a lot tosses and turns at night.

I'm too smart and think a lot - that's why I drink to kill extra brain cells.

If you hurry, you will lie in the grave before others.

He who gets up early tramples the path for me.

You can always justify idleness by searching for the meaning of life.

PR statuses about life

PR statuses are a special type of statuses on social networks, which, in addition to standard positioning, have a practical purpose, that is, they allow you to receive spiritual or material benefits.

Girls, stop sending me your nude photos and asking me for sex. The purpose of this status: female psychology works as follows - they are attracted to a man who is interesting to other women. Status works in reverse, that is, it allows you to attract the attention of girls.

Guys, stop asking me to get married, I'm waiting for just one thing. The intended purpose of this status: a man prefers to be chosen from a set, that is, the principle of competition operates.

Above are new statuses about life that are relevant in 2016 - 2017. However, the most interesting and sincere status is born based on a string of life events occurring with an individual at a given moment or a certain period of time. It’s enough just to write down your thoughts to get a high-quality status that is understandable to you and your friends, that is, the main audience of your page on the social network.

New Year is perhaps the most wonderful holiday that not only children, but also adults look forward to. This is a time of gifts, fulfillment of wishes and real magic. On holidays, children write letters to Santa Claus, and parents run around the shops in search of cherished gifts for their children. Traditionally, the holiday begins to be celebrated on the evening of December 31st; before celebrating it, you need to spend the outgoing year. There are many jokes about the fact that the holiday begins on December 31st and ends at least on January 7th. Of course, there is so much to do during the New Year holidays: meet all your friends and visit all your relatives. On this magical holiday, everyone deserves warmth and attention.

In 2019, I wish you 12 months without illness, 53 weeks of all the best, 365 days of happiness, 8760 hours of success, 525600 minutes of love, and 315360000 seconds of pleasant moments.

The anticipation of the New Year awakens the child in me... Like waking up in the morning as a child, I want to see a Christmas tree with gifts under it... I want to play snowballs and eat snow and not think about getting sick.

May Happiness knock on your door on New Year's Eve... And God grant that you find yourself at home at this moment!

The tangerines are in use, which means the New Year is coming!

I love winter and the feeling that the holidays are approaching... New Year's days... Days of fulfillment of desires, belief in miracles and fairy tales!

New Years is soon! Let all of you... have someone nearby who will peel your tangerines... And someone who will steal these tangerines from both of you...

My status went into the forest, probably behind the tree.

Funny and cool quotes

I want a man... small, plump, with gifts... Santa Claus, I’m waiting!

We'll soon be on the Internet, we won't be celebrating the New Year, but updating it.

Never stick snowflakes on the refrigerator on New Year's Eve - they resemble the letter Z to drunk guests.

Only here on New Year’s Day the President’s congratulations are broadcast on all channels, but they watch it only on the first one.

The New Year holiday is a dinner ending with breakfast.

Grandfather Frost, I would like... Gazprom shares - so that I don’t bother you anymore.

If a fat guy comes up at night and puts you in a bag... don’t freak out! Someone just asked Santa Claus for you for the New Year;)

Dear Grandfather Frost, for the New Year, put a piece of happiness under my Christmas tree... 180 cm tall, please.

My children are already writing a letter to Santa Claus! And Santa Claus sits next to him on the sofa and goes nuts!

Prepared thoroughly for the New Year! I even moved the scales back 5 kg...

December is approaching the middle, it's time to decide what to dress up for the night from December 31 to January 9.

- How did you spend New Years?
- I don’t know, they haven’t told us yet...

Statuses with meaning

Snow... Adults say that this is frozen water, but children know better: these are little stars with the magical taste of the New Year.

I’m getting ready for the New Year, it seems my liver is suspecting something.

Dear Grandfather Frost, cotton wool beard, I don’t need gifts! Increase your salary!

New Year is a time when you are more glad to receive a call at 3 am than to receive a call at 10 am.

The New Year is a good reason to leave some people in the old ways.

Someone dreams of a new life. And for some, the New Year is enough.

Every man should be a little Santa Claus for his family, help his Snow Maiden create a fairy tale and give gifts, well, if this doesn’t suit anyone, there is also a vacancy for a deer.

Beautiful statuses about the New Year

The New Year gives us a great chance to change our lives for the better. This is a reason to abandon the usual, but so boring, step over fears, leave doubts behind, smile at the world around and begin to build your destiny according to your own, exclusive project.

At the strike of the clock, at twelve sharp,
The world will change around.
It's like we're in a fairy tale,
Let's suddenly plunge back into childhood...

They say that on New Year’s Eve everything always comes true, even things that can’t come true the whole year!

Dear Grandfather Frost!!! I want to make an application! Put just five boxes under the Christmas tree for my friends: fill the first with health, the second with luck, the third with kindness, the fourth with patience, and put faith in the fifth! And I also beg you, tie all these boxes with a ribbon of happiness! Thank you, Grandfather Frost. I'll be looking forward to it...

As we get older, our New Year's wish list gets smaller and smaller, and what we really want cannot be bought with money.

There are many aphorisms about the New Year. Some of them are humorous and amusing, while others inspire philosophical reflection and encourage change. Choose the expressions you like for your statuses, give yourself and those around you a New Year's mood!